As the Week 6 episode began, FBI Agent Hammer and his new Deputy, The Commodore, were investigating some security doors that had been mysteriously forced open. Suddenly, Orange Julius appeared and was furious at the pair for not rescuing him last week. Agent Hammer defused the situation by asking The Commodore to be the best man at his upcoming wedding, and for Julius to be the DJ. They then concluded with a blood pact, with Orange Julius admitting after that he had Hepatitis C.
Lil’ Daisy was making wishes from the fountain, when the friendly, mysterious stranger CHED appeared. He was allegedly from Orlando, and wanted to meet lots of “tasty humans.”
Agent Hammer and Cynthia Monets were in Rich’s registering for wedding gifts. Hammer made sure they were getting three copies of the Jodeci CD they wanted. He then told Cynthia she could NEVER know his real name.
Rosemary Splat and Oral Hanks were strolling through the mall, hand in hand, planning their upcoming date. After quite a lot of bad ideas, the pair settled on Maggiano’s in Buckhead, which would take a day’s travel to get to.
Lil’ Daisy was in Spencer’s, searching for weapons to fight the looming CHUD menace. Lark Darkcastle offered to train her in hand-to-hand combat in his Dojo, and then began her training by leveling her with a vicious kick to the thorax.
CHED visited The Commodore at his arcade. They were having a great time until The Commodore went off on a racist rant about CHUD’s and revealed he was extremely bigoted about them… as well as maybe a couple other groups, too.
Agent Hammer and Oral finally had a face off. Oral revealed that he had not forgiven Hammer for leaving him to die in Vietnam, where they were best buddies. We then saw a ‘Nam flashback, where we learned they had been there in the mid 90’s selling Jostens class rings.
Rosemary went to Spencer’s to find something to spice up her date with Oral. Lark immediately embraced her, gave her a passionate kiss and told her, “Now go give that to somebody else!”
The Commodore and Hammer were discussing some leads, when once again The Commodore made a semi racist slip, causing Agent Hammer to leave in disgust. Orange Julius arrived and suggested some sensitivity training.
CHED followed the delicious smell of cookies to Great American Cookie, where Rosemary Splat was dealing with a splitting headache and sensitivity to light. She assumed it was just an inoperable brain tumor, but CHED noticed something special about Rosemary and stated that they were “similar.”
Cynthia was shopping when Oral approached her and tried to win her back by putting down Hammer and building himself up. In another tactical move, he invited Cynthia and Hammer to double date with him and Rosemary at Maggiano’s. Oral then revealed that Hammer had been married before. When Cynthia bravely stated that his previous marriage didn’t affect her at all, Oral added, “Ah, my dear, but he never got divorced!”
Back at the Dojo, Lil’ Daisy’s training was almost complete. Her final test from Lark – stomp on a small box that may or may not contain a puppy. After reminding herself that some sacrifice was necessary to protect the ones she loved, Daisy demolished the box. Lark’s horrified response was, “YOU’RE A MONSTER!”
CHED and Hammer were playing skeeball and having a great time. Hammer confided some personal hopes and fears to CHED, who also shared that he was very hungry because everyone at the mall was “so friendly and tasty.” After that, Hammer invited CHED along to the double date at Maggiano’s.
At Maggiano’s, the double date was going badly. Rosemary was comatose under the table, CHED was serving the unlimited salad and breadsticks and Oral was incensed that instead of linguini they had been served fettuccini. Suddenly, CHED announced that everyone had been fattened up enough and he was ready to eat. Lil’ Daisy kicked in the door of the restaurant and leaped into the middle of the dinner. Lark, as her sensei, warned everyone to be careful, as now Lil’ Daisy could kill with a word. Singling out CHED, Daisy snapped his neck and killed him, though his final words were ominous: “There will be many more…” Finally, the Maggiano’s manager arrived and announced that they would not split checks on parties of five or more.
To read last the episode five recap, visit this link.
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