Amber Nash as Jelilah Dixon ... pregnant with a fully-grown human!
Amber Nash as Jelilah Dixon … pregnant with a fully-grown human!

Dad’s Garage Theatre is presenting the improv soap opera “Scandal” every Saturday night through Sept. 17. “Scandal” is set at a fictitious shopping mall in the Old Fourth Ward that’s on its last legs and its wacky denizens. As media sponsor for the event, INtown is posting a recap of the Saturday episodes. Did you miss seeing the incredible Tom Key from Theatrical Outfit in last weekend’s episode? This Saturday, Sept., 3, Key is back one last time as the incredibly weird bookstore owner, David David David.

Week 11 of Scandal! began with The Commodore stopping by the Southern Belle Depot to check on Jelilah Dixon’s pregnancy. Due to the recent hex that had been placed on her, Jelilah had what looked like a full grown human in her belly, and she was very anxious to give birth.

Orange Julius, freshly back from a month in The Forbidden Zone, stopped by the bookstore. He couldn’t believe his eyes when he recognized David David David as his estranged brother! After a long embrace, they realized that they share a common goal – uniting humanity and the CHUD in brotherly love, rather than war.

Oral Hanks stopped by to visit Lark Darkcastle and give him Brice’s hair, which was apparently the hair of Lark’s “real” son, who is most likely now a bald hobo somewhere. Lark vowed to do the opposite of what Oral would do – find his family and love them like a father.

Sparky Reinhardt awoke from a terrible nightmare: he had discovered Dr. Anomaly and Rosemary Splat scheming with the King of the CHUDs, who turned out to really be Chugga Kingsford! And then Chugga sliced both their wrists open and infected Sparky with CHUD cooties. But a nearby Dr. Anomaly assured Sparky that it was no dream, and he was already turning CHUD.

The Commodore went to see Orange Julius, distraught that Jelilah had banned him from being a part of the child’s life. Orange Julius offered some balanced, mature advice on gaining her forgiveness and acceptance, but The Commodore misinterpreted it as, “steal the baby.”

Oral Hanks was looking to skip town and lay low from the law, so he visited Dr. Anomaly’s discount travel agency. Dr. Anomaly stated that he could solve Oral’s legal problems, by necromancing FBI Agent Hammer back to life. He would just need every piece of the blown apart body to do it.

Sparky was at the makeup counter, trying to cover up the green CHUD veins starting to spread across his face. Lark noticed his efforts, and argued that since Sparky was a dedicated CHUD hunter, he must now eliminate himself. Instead, Sparky chose Option Z and cut off Lark’s hand and ate it.

Jelilah was in her store, relaxing and being very pregnant. Suddenly Rosemary and David arrived, and had a look inside Jelilah. They saw that her baby was part CHUD, but also a new species – a VHUD (Vegan Humanoid Underground Dweller)!

Sparky visited Orange Julius at his smoothie stand, and told him that his dream of a peaceful Human-CHUD world was just a fantasy.

Lark, missing a hand, went to Dr. Anomaly’s outpatient clinic for treatment. Unfortunately Lark’s insurance through Spencer’s was decidedly sub par. He owed a $400 co-pay. Dr. Anomaly generously agreed to let Lark use the 6-month layaway plan and get his stump sewed up in the next few weeks.

Jelilah had an unparalleled pregnancy craving and proceeded to tear the mall Cinnabon franchise to pieces, shrieking and stomping about.

In a different part of the mall, Oral Hanks had a similar fit, tearing his location to pieces and shrieking and stomping about.

David and Orange Julius were cleaning up after the chaos of the twin freakouts when David dropped a bombshell – he was still a virgin! But that led Julius to a remarkable realization – the “Prophecy” stated that only a virgin hand could deliver The Chosen One at birth! They rushed to find Jelilah.

Sparky Reinhardt stood in front of the CHUD hordes, exhorting them that their savior was on the way in the form of a Vegan CHUD. He also warned that there were anti-CHUD forces trying to stop the birth. Whipping the crowd into a frenzy, he led them on a charge towards the mall food court.

David and Orange Julius arrived just in time, before Dr. Anomaly could try and c-section Jelilah’s baby out of her. David held his virgin hand up to the light and then plunged it deep into Jelilah! An electric shock seemed to run through him and he screamed in pain, along with Jelilah… but just what would emerge from her womb?

Read the episode 10 recap at this link.

To purchase tickets and to find out more information about “Scandal,” visit Dad’s Garage is located at 569 Ezzard St. in the Old Fourth Ward.


Collin Kelley

Collin Kelley has been the editor of Atlanta Intown for two decades and has been a journalist and freelance writer for 35 years. He’s also an award-winning poet and novelist.